From Corporate America to Stay at Home Mom

Over the past five and a half years I have been blessed to work for a wonderful company in the corporate world. A company that gave me great opportunities and was the foundation of my career. Walking away from great opportunities is not easy.

As we spent time in Uganda our day in and day out purpose was to bond with our new son. Because neither of us were working, it gave us the opportunity to completely focus on our family. In this, L took on more of the provider/leader role, and me more the caregiver role. It was wonderful. It was natural and just happened.

I remember sitting with L in Uganda one afternoon as the sun was beginning to set while D played in our guesthouse yard and talking about how it felt nice to be in our "real" roles. The roles that God ordained for us. For husband and wife. How it felt great to be 100% devoted to D's adjustment and growth. To back track and bit (and be a little vulnerable, which is always fun! not.), When L and I met I was an independent woman so when we got married submitting and letting him lead in everything was not a piece of cake for me. Not that it always is today, but it is clear God is using this season to graciously teach me all He wants me to be as a wife and mother. So through all of this, we decided for us to be completely devoted to D and his adjustment, and what God was calling us to, I needed to quite my job and stay at home.

On May 21st I spent my first day home alone with D. D is an awesome kid...really he is. But boy do I ever remember my sweet husband walking through the door that day and the joy it brought me. I also remember sitting at the kitchen table and questioning if this is really what we needed to do. Was I really supposed to stay home?

Up until the moment I called my boss to resign, and even after he answered the phone, I went back and forth. But remember that new submission thing I am learning? L wasn't going back and forth. He knew what God wanted for our family and down deep I did too. With tears running down my face I sobbed like a baby and told my boss I was not coming back to work. He was so gracious, understanding, and kind but I felt like I had just broken up with my long time boyfriend "work". It hurt. My heart was broken. I was sad about the friends I might never see again and the opportunities I was passing up. I was terrified about the future. I was grieving a piece of me that was gone.

But in the days and weeks that have past I have been reminded what a sweet, sweet blessing it is to be at home with my boy all day, everyday. My husband works his tail off for our family and nothing has ever been sexier or sweeter to me. My days may have went from conference calls and over-glorified travel to goldfish and Barney, but it is so, so, so worth it. It is worth it to be in God's plan even when your heart has to break and you have to take a leap of faith. He is faithful and He does know what He is doing. It is worth it to see God growing and adjusting my little boy so well. It is worth it.

Many people ask how I am doing and if it is all I thought it would be? I am doing good and count myself extremely blessed to be at home with D. It is something I always dreamed of doing and I am loving being in that dream. It is WAY more exhausting than I could have ever imagined...emotionally, mentally, physically. A friend posted this article and I thought the writer explained it well for all of you who are confused why it is exhausting :)

I have no idea how long God will have me at home, another month or years, but I am so very grateful for this time and I could not imagine it any other way.

Disclaimer: I do not believe every mother should stay at home and if they do not then God is not teaching them these things, this is just the way He is teaching me right now.